COLUMNS AND DEPARTMENTS

To Kill Two Mockingbirds

For a busy mom, story time and personal time converge -- what a happy ending.

September/October 1999

Reading time min

To Kill Two Mockingbirds

Dave Whamond

I'm looking for a book catalog that will help me, a working mom, kill two birds with one stone. I know I should read to my children every day -- but where's the time? And I'd like to catch up on my own reading as well. If only the two activities could be combined!

Think of the savings in time and money if the newly consolidated publishing industry merged not just its book lists, but the books themselves. Families could read together from a variety of new titles. Here's a sampling from the catalog of my dreams:

Angelina Ballerina's Ashes -- Toddlers and parents alike will adore this poignant tale of an impoverished Irish mouse who yearns to dance on the big stage.

Goodnight Moon in the Garden of Good and Evil -- The tender repetition of phrases will ease your child to sleep. Then you can stay up late reading the parents-only section on hormone treatments for Lady Chablis.

Snow White and the Seven Habits of Highly Effective People -- Talk about your paradigm shifts! Snow White realizes that hanging out with Dopey and the gang while she waits for her prince is self-defeating behavior. She learns to think win-win, be pro-active and color her own parachute.

Spot Goes to the Animal Farm -- Just lift the flaps to teach your youngster all about the evils of communism.

The Gingerbread Man in Full -- "You can't catch me," boasts the hero of this sequel to Tom Wolfe's novel, abridged for child-size attention spans.

Pollyanna Karenina -- Romantic Russian heroine skips the train, learns to accentuate the positive.

Pat the Catcher in the Rye -- A tactile book for the young and young at heart. Use your fingertips to spot the phonies!

Nancy Drew on the Right Side of Her Brain -- Between art lessons, everyone's favorite girl sleuth tracks an international art forgery ring. Turn the book upside down to discover hidden clues.

Tender Is the Night Before Christmas -- In this Jazz Age holiday classic, St. Nick pays a visit to decadent American expats on the French Riviera. What will he leave in their stockings?

The Stone Soup Diaries -- A woman looks back on a lifetime of potlucks.

The Lion, the Witch and the Working Woman's Wardrobe -- Four children escape the Blitz and share adventures in an imaginary land. Much fantasizing about the clothes they will wear after the war. Bonus chapter: 19 ways to tie a scarf.

Gone with the Wind in the Willows -- Scarlett of Tara and Toad of Toad Hall team up in a romantic animal fantasy.

The Velveteen Rabbit Is Rich -- A stuffed toy wrestles with middle age and finally becomes Real by embracing the materialism of his time.

Chicken Soup with Rice for the Soul -- These 12 recipes, one for each month, are heartwarming, if a bit overdone.

One Fish, Two Fish, Red Fish, Blue Highways -- Put the kid in the minivan and head for the back roads -- or at least daydream about it while reading aloud this memoir in verse.

A Child's Garden of Satanic Verses -- We've condensed this epic novel into a few easy-to-understand poems your kids will love. Also available: Blueberries for Salman Rushdie.

The Scarlet Alphabet -- In this educational masterpiece, each letter is represented by a big no-no. You know what A stands for; B is for Bigamy, C for Calumny. Guaranteed to get your family talking about values!

Charlotte's Webster's Unabridged Dictionary -- In which a remarkable spider spells some really hard words.

A Clockwork Orange, Green Eggs and Ham -- A futuristic look at the food pyramid that's sure to please young and old.

Howards End: Once Upon a Potty -- Gives new meaning to the phrase, "Only connect." Especially pertinent to little boys.

Are You My Mommy Dearest? -- Baby boomer tumbles from her nest and sets out in search of a mother, only to be snatched up by a bad-tempered bulldozer.

On the Road with Runaway Bunny -- The Beats travel cross-country, but they just can't get away from mom!


Lucy Sankey Russell, '82, is a lawyer in Charlottesville, Va.

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